‘I think, I like him’
A 15 year old boys, says, “I often keep getting attracted to many girls, with some I become infatuated, but then it is only for some days. I hope I am normal”. With the physical changes and sexual development, adolescents tend to develop attraction towards the individuals of the opposite sex. This is a very natural desire which comes with growing up . Attraction towards the opposite sex is often followed by falling in love i.e. getting infatuated. Infatuation is puppy love which fades away after sometime.
“I am scared of the future”
Adolescents often feel insecure as they are uncertain of their future, as well as confused and worried about their life in general.
A list of adolescent worries
School, Homework, getting along with teachers, good marks, not failing, college entrance. Being accepted by Classmates.
Getting along with siblings, conflicts with parents. Arguments at home, Parental domination.
Are they true friends? Not be accepted, to be a leader in the group, to be popular, not to let friends down.
Career choice, success in career, getting a job.
should look good, pimples, fear of losing good health, being slim and trim.
‘I become over emotional’
Due to over expectation and constant nagging from parents, adolescents feel irritated and angry. They often express their anger by sulking, refusing to talk to anybody or loudly criticizing those who have angered them. As the body changes physically, teenagers start feeling slightly awkward about the changes in the beginning. It takes them some time to adjust to these changes. During this period they often like to be left alone. Their food habits also become erratic and they get angry very fast.
‘I am very curious’
Teenagers are very curious to know about things happening around them as well as interested in trying them out and getting more information. Due to this they indulge into activities like reading pornography books, seeing blue films, gambling, rock climbing and car racing. They also want to know, what it feels like to smoke, drink and take drugs. They are always in look out of doing things which are novel and different.
‘I like going into a different world’
Daydreaming is part of growing up and adolescents spend many hours, in imagining themselves to be a ‘Conquering Hero’ getting success in life or a ‘Frustrated hero’ (being a failure in life). They love to flow away to with these thoughts. For some, differentiating between fantasy and real world often becomes difficult. Such teenagers later find it difficult to cope up with the problems of life.
‘I look as if I am elder to him’
Some children mature sexually (connected with the physical changes) earlier than their sex group. They are called early matures, while those who mature sexually later than their sex group are called late matures. For boys, early maturing is advantages as it helps to derive much of their prestige and status in the peer group, as well as become leaders of their groups, and popular among girls. while on the other hand boys who mature late tend to become depressed, rebellious, attention seeking and also are less popular.
Ravi, a 14 year old boys says, “I am the thinnest and shortest boy in the class. Everybody teases me and calls me chutku. I feel so bad”.
Girls, who mature early are considered to be grown up and sophisticated in their behavior, appearance and thus have problems in socializing. They also lack confidence and are shy and self conscious of their over developed body. While on the other hand, girls who mature late generally become concerned about their normality. They often avoid the company of the other adolescents and prefer to be left alone. As such, early or late mature adolescents only temporarily find it difficult to adjust to their under or over developed body, with passage of time, most or them, are able to cope up with it.